4. “Care packages containing your preferred snacks will be sent to you by Tim Walz.” J.D. Vance will send you cease and desist letters.
5. “Tim Walz is the educator you seek out when you require a confidant.” J.D. is the individual who overhears the conversation and informs the entire school.
6. “Tim Walz is the individual with whom you would enjoy a beer.” J.D. Vance is the individual who consumes your beverage when you rise to use the restroom.
7. “Tim Walz is the individual who will assist you in placing your bag in the overhead bin without requiring a request.” “J.D. Vance is the individual who advises you not to bring a carry-on if you are unable to lift it yourself, and then observes as you struggle.”
